Queer Kid of Color

A Racial Apartheid
What happened to the queer community? There was a time where the we of all races were united to combat the anti-gay rhetoric that homophobes spewed from their mouths. We fought together in the 1960s during government tyranny and police evasion of gay facilities. Now, it seems like the queer community is under a racial apartheid which is purported by queer organizations and bluntly exercised through mainstream queer images. When I came out I never thought my queerness would be sublimated through my Blackness. I never believed under any instances that being Black will be a battle within an already oppressed community. I was wrong. Every time I hear a white person scream “gay pride!” I feel like the context they use it in is subliminally ingrained into the message “white gay pride!” Gay pride has never represented me. I’m not on Showtime’s The L Word, or Queer As Folk. LOGO only gave me Noah’s Arc and The Reception. The last time I saw a gay man on The Advocate was last year when Doug Spearmen of Noah’s Arc was on the cover. This racial apartheid within the queer community is why you never hear about new movements occurring to build bridges between the queer and heterosexual community. We’re too focused on gay parades, branding ourselves and being separatist, that we’ve lost our ability to revolt and fight against the prejudices of society.


Why I Don’t Support Marriage Equality
I consistently face the blunder of organizations that markets “gay marriage” on parade floats with a Washington Mutual logo commercializing on the bedrock that goes against the historical context of an institution used to populate the world. This blunder is spearheaded by members of The Gay Agenda (as I call it). I have said it once and I will say it again: I do not support marriage equality. Marriage equality is severely overrated. Because they want to be equal, the proponents of The Gay Agenda are embroiling over a battle that will never fuse. If I get married it will be under the basis of 1,138 plus rights that comes with having a legally recognized institution. Marriage will not be an institution that validates my love and commitment to my partner. I will not push for marriage equality when 46% of Black gay men are living with HIV. I will not push for marriage equality when young queers buy image and not books. I will not push for marriage equality until every queer person I know knows the year the Stonewall riots occurred. I will not push for marriage equality until the queer community is not comprised of image extremist. Can you make that happen? Or perhaps marriage for queers under different legislative means can get me out to support marriage equality.

Gay “Families”
I have a problem with the relational names queer people throw around. You know, the relational names that refers to gay men as mothers or gay male friends as their sisters. It makes me, in many ways, sad. It saddens me because while we’re trying to exercise our human rights as equal people we come across as stereotypical by reinforcing the stigma that says that queer men are trying to be anything other than men. I can understand calling someone your gay father, but calling a man a mother? Calling a man a daughter? Calling a man a sister? I’m ignorant in the subject, so please try to open my mind. I have had gay men ask to be my ‘gay mother’. I dismiss them as gay mothers, but welcome them as mentors. I don’t have any close friends with a gay family. So it’s not like I can go to any of them and ask them to explain the terminology of calling men “daughter” or “sister” or “mother”. I understand gay families, I do. I just don’t get why a man will call himself a mother. I’m ignorant in the subject, so please be light if you’re going to try to convey the idea behind the terminology.

I will be posting this weekend. I apologize for the weak postings. But my eyes are strained from the glare of the computer because of all the time I’ve put into final papers.

My apologies.

Christopher Street the series has wrapped production. Expect the release of the project by the end of the summer.

Please support my short film which I will hopefully complete by this summer. Donate as much as you can. $1, $5, $10, whatever you can will help. Anything is greatly appreciated. Please donate here.

I will be discontinuing the blog before the summer is over. It is a decision I have been thinking about for a while and I’ve finally decided after two years the QueerKidofColor blog is finished. I appreciate the support of each and everyone of my readers so much. Thank you for being with me for the last two years.

I can’t ever say I hate being single, because I have never been in a relationship. I’ve dated a few guys here and there but never felt an emotional effect after breaking it off with them. The only person I have ever needed closure with was That Nice Guy, because I really liked him. When people tell me they hate being single, I always think ‘Well it works for me’. Hmph. Maybe I’ll understand what they mean when I’m in a relationship that doesn’t work.

I have a system. It’s called the System of Stevenism. In this system there exist a one chance policy. Which basically means you have one chance to mess up, and after that you’re gone. Whether it be your late for a date, try to kiss me on the first date, ask me whether I’m a top or a bottom, try to have phone sex with me, tell me you have no job, etc., you lose your one chance. I believe everyone at the age of 18 should know the components of being a good catch. And if you don’t, then, well you should be 17!

I’m not necessarily a good catch to a lot of people. I’m aggressive. I’m a republican. I’m a control-freak. I’m argumentative. I’m a nerd. However, I know that I can be of substance to someone someday. As long as you know you are ready and prepared to enter a relationship or begin dating then your good. When you feel comfortable enough to let someone into your space and you’re ready to open up to the mysteries and joys of another human being then you are indeed at solace with yourself. A lot of people enter dating and relationships while they’re not even at peace with themselves or prepared to let someone into their space. This is not good! I call these people pretendicans!

As much as I don’t like to admit it there’s so much stuff I need to uncan that I don’t feel like I’m ready to give myself to another person. If you want to date me, you’ll have to cater to my program. I’m aggressive and I like to make the decisions. I bitch and complain unless I get my way. Ironically, some guys find that hot. I guess its a dominance thing. But it’s something I’m working on fixing, I hate being that way. I really hate being that way. When I was with That Nice Guy, who I still speak to on occasion, his masculinity got in the way of me being the aggressor. I hated when he opened the door for me, or offered to pay, or held my book bag. Actually, who am I kidding, I loved it. But his reasoning to court me every moment was that he was more masculine than I. Ultimately, our clashing aggressiveness subsided and I had to let him go. Well, that and some other reason, but we’ll get to do that some other time…or not. I think that’s why I’m generally attracted to feminine guys {even though I always end up dating someone who’s more inbetween or masculine—urgh!}, feminine guys are a lot more open to someone else having control over the relationship. Hi fems!

::RAMBLING TIME::

I can’t stand guys with baggage. They annoy the hell out of me. I don’t want to know about your ex-boyfriend drama, your life at home, you failing courses in school, don’t spring that on me within the first five dates. It’s so tacky and tasteless. I digress.

Ever since I was a young boy my mom would tell me how she couldn’t wait until I fall in love and get married. She would tell my two younger sisters, my elder brother, and I that she would get the bill for the wedding, as to say as long as every detail of the wedding is finalize through her, she’ll pay for it. Blah. I wonder if that applies now that I’m a queer who would probably never end up marrying a woman, but some nerd from Atlanta who aspires to be a CEO. I’ll probably end up having 24 groomsmen, 300 invitees, an expensive ballroom, hey mom can you cover that.

::SIGH::

I don’t believe in Marriage Equality. Trust me, it’s not like it sounds. I think a lot of queers forget about the historical context behind marriage, and what it meant in the earlier half of this century, but also abroad. I think it’s important to preserve not so much the sanctity of marriage {I think that’s a whole lot of bullshit}, but to preserve the history that came with the institution of marriage. I do believe queers should marry, but through different legislation. My stance on marriage has changed over the months, because I did my research. I can go on and on about it, but I’m not. I’m sure I’ll talk about it in the future.

End.

Sorry I’ve been Missing  in Action for a while. Final papers are due next week and I’m writing and revising like crazyyy. I have three postings that I have already drafted but need to look them over before I post them. I’m going to try and post something tomorrow. Sorrryyyy. In the meantime read my new favorite blog by a new blogger named Corey, check out the blog here.

Peace!

It seems like acting, modeling, running a production company, producing an independent tv series, and being a national make up representative for one of the largest cosmetics companies in America isn’t enough for Dwight Allen O’Neal. Dwight has unofficially release his track single appropriately titled “Papparazzi Rant”.  We love him don’t we? Check out the song on his music myspace page, but please don’t tell him I sent you. He didn’t want anyone to know about the page until Monday! Thanks!

 By the way the song is fire! I can’t stop listening to it!

Yessir, we have the next great blogger on deck. I can feel it. I’m an addict and he’s only had one posting!

His name is Corey and he’s a handsome gentleman with an eye for detail and great prose.

Corey don’t forget about me when you’re winning blog awards and have a high readership!

Add him to your blogroll, comment on his first posting, and lets show him some blogger love!

link: http://illkeepyouposted.typepad.com/

Yes, I’m dating again.

**applauds**

Now, I need some of your help.

I like Person A, who is intelligent, attractive, an entering computer science major at a prestigous university, a compulsive shopper, who loves to spend money on expensive clothing, and hangs out at the clubs every weekend. He compares himself to Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan… Seriously?
I like him. He’s cool, but I also like…

Person B, I can carry a conversation with him for hours, he’s also smart, nicely accented, a hardworker, and is in college getting on his grind majoring in Business and English. He’s not so much into the gay culture, he’s very reserved, and I’m trying to turn him into a republican {but that’s beside the point}. I would totally ask him out on a date, but I can’t date him because his bestfriend is into me! And his bestfriend {Person A}, and I are like dating!

What should I do?

A few weeks ago I reported that Jensen Atwood will be returning to reprise his role as Wade in the movie version of Noah’s Arc. That was all B.S. courtesy of LOGO trying to keep Shemar Moore’s role in the film under wraps. But Darryl Stephens-who’s one of my favorites- haven’t you notice? Darryl revealed through his Myspace blog that Shemar Moore is infact in the production. I’m not surprised, this is a smart move from LOGO. They want to get the queens, the fag hags, the religious right winged women, and the gays into the movies and what better way but to use Shemar Moore’s appeal and celebrity? He’s already being speculated for being a homo. The Noah’s Arc movie is going to have a ride of free promotion and will be appearing in the tabloids, magazines across the nation, blogs, and gossip sites everywhere. Smart move LOGO.

It’s unfortunate that Jensen Atwood won’t reprise his role as Wade. I enjoyed watching the on camera chemistry between him and Darryl Stephens.

I have a thought, maybe LOGO was mad at  Jensen for starring in Dante’s Cove which airs on the HERE! TV network, LOGO’s competition, and they gave him his walking papers for making that transition?

Nah–

Two years ago when the first season of Noah’s Arc hadn’t even premiere Darryl Stephens was spilling the beans on the show. Now, he’s spilling the beans on the movie. And, according to him, the film is in danger of being pulled. And he’s pulling no punches when talking about his fellow actors, calling the young girl who plays Kenya “ foulmouthed and evil“. He goes on to write, “She’s here with her father, who is clearly an alcoholic. It’s sad to see how his disease is turning his cute little girl into a monster.” That’s nothing though! He even semi-revealed the plot of the show!

He posted these things on his myspace blog! And, I have it all for you. Here it is, Darryl Stephens blog entry on his hot tranny mess of a movie:
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Hey everybody. I know I haven’t been very good about checking in, but we have been SUPER-BUSY out here and my Internet access is limited. We’re scheduled to wrap this Friday and things have been going really well…Actually, things had been going okay. Some of you know I got really sick when we first got here. I caught a fierce cold as soon as I stepped off the plane and could barely speak during the first week of shooting. And then during the ski-tutoring, I crashed into Rodney and messed up my hip. He’s fine (even though he’s still insisting that I did it on purpose), but I’ve been walking around with a limp for the whole movie. And the whole “Black Gay Ski Weekend in Aspen” theme has been looking kind of forced, since there are practically NO black extras in this part of Canada. All the big club scenes have been looking more like Irish pubs than black gay parties. It’s kind of whack.And speaking of bars…Merwin flew in from Toronto last Friday to shoot all of his scenes this week. He was clearly pissed about the difference in the U.S/Canadian pay rates and he was being really shitty to everybody. He actually went off on a Logo executive at the pre-wrap party last Saturday. And then before anyone could step in and talk him down, he disappeared. Nobody knew where he’d gone. It turns out, he had gone to some other bar, gotten into a fight with some dude and gone to jail (or a holding tank) for the whole night. When he was finally released Sunday morning, his face was so bruised and banged up, they were scrambling all day Sunday to recast him. (He looks a hot tranny mess.) Monday, yesterday, they still hadn’t recast and we ended up missing that whole day of shooting. Now the production is a day behind schedule. I’m assuming they’ve found somebody by today, but there’s apparently now some danger of Logo pulling the plug on the whole production if we go over-budget at all. And missing that one day of shooting has everyone in a panic. The whole set is in a tizzy. It’s really ugly out here.

And then there’s Shemar. Nice guy. Great kisser. But…He has been flying his girlfriend out every weekend. And when she’s here, he refuses to rehearse. Like, he does not come out of his room. At all. It’s weird. I never talk about people like this, but you all are my friends and I need to get this stuff out. Last weekend, his girlfriend (also a hot tranny mess) showed up with this other dude. Sigh… He has Channing Tatum’s voice and swagger and he looks like a mixed race version of that model Jamie Dornan. He is so fucking…ugh! His name is Ashley. We all saw when transpo drove up with Kelly (I think that’s the girlfriend’s name) to the hotel on Friday. Of course, then they all disappeared like Shemar and what’s her name always do. But on Saturday, Ashley–the dude–somehow ended up at the pre-wrap party. The production had given us all drink tickets… I was a little drunk. So I started talking to him… we kind of hit it off. And then, well, you know… I was drunk! I guess Shemar found out and now he’s PISSED at me. Like, not speaking to me at all. So I have no idea how we’re going to shoot all of our scenes this week, IF we even go back into production. And now Patrik is mad at ME, like I did something wrong. Shemar is really being a little bitch about the whole thing and I wish he would get over himself. I was DRUNK!And then there’s all the recasting. Charles, the guy who is playing Trey in the movie, is sweet. But kind of goofy. And really thin. I mean, I guess it’ll play all right. But the shot I saw of Trey and Alex skiing looked kind of crazy to me. He’s tall and everything, but he’s just super skinny. I don’t know. And he’s Canadian. With that kind of thick Canadian accent. Everything is “going OOTside” and “ABOOT that scene.” He’s nice, though. In that Canadian way…

I don’t know y’all. I was really unsure about the “Black Gay Ski Weekend-Surprise Wedding” storyline from the beginning. Now I feel like it’s just not gonna work. The odds are stacked against us. And I’m still limping! Send us some good vibes and let’s all hope the guy they replaced Merwin isn’t a complete douche bag. I am so over these diva actors.

Oh. And I can’t even talk about the hair extensions. They have me looking like a black, femme Sideshow Bob. And it’s ATTACHED to my head. If it was a wig, at least I could take it off and look like a human on the weekends. Ugh!

This movie is a hot tranny mess.

I’m sure I’m gonna get in trouble for posting this… It will probably have to come down by April 2nd.

xo,
d.

Why is Darryl Stephens acting like this?

Well, you know what they say– Noah’s Arc aint no Christopher Street the series!

UPDATE: IT WAS ALL AN APRIL FOOL’S JOKE– Damn, I’m so gullible.