on the scale of beauty, i’m a simple 5.
I was catching up with a guy that I use to date a few months ago, he’s in the ballroom scene and walks pretty boy. I have really been trying to lose connection with him for the longest, because he’s someone whose just adding a lot of stress to my life. I keep in contact because there’s a shortage of love and people who care about him. I wanted to be some sort of support for him. When we were on the phone he randomly brought up the topic of another guy I use to date in the ballroom scene and how the guy is a 2, he’s an 8, and I’m a 5 on a scale of 1-10 based on attractiveness. The judgment would have been fine had he not said it so condescendingly. As if he’s above me because he looks better, dresses better, walks balls and wins trophies. That’s all good and dandy, but you’re still stupid. See, I can be condescending too.
I hung up the phone on him so quick I’m sure his head spun. Growing up I had severe low self esteem and insecurities, I refuse to go back to that place again. I’m at the age where I’m comfortable with my looks and see my imperfections as beauty marks and not flaws.
Needless to say I’m not talking to him anymore. He lost an ally and a friend. The shallowness of some people. I don’t care how unattractive I am, I’m still intelligent.
Have a great weekend.
nrlanga said,
December 12, 2008 at 2:57 pm
Dear Friend
I have read some of your posts. I wold like to revisits, as your writings have interested me.
If you like short stories and paintings, then a short visit to my blogs would be an entertaining one.
Naval Langa
J. Clarence said,
December 12, 2008 at 6:18 pm
“Beauty marks not flaws,” that’s such a great way to think about it. Well some people just think very highly of themselves, to the extent that they cannot comprehend how saying such a thing might not be the best idea in the world.
Still if you have to find some silver-lining somewhere: he was humble enough to give himself a “8″ rather than a “10″ or shy-seconds a “9″–the “I’m awesome, but I don’t want to be too cocky grade”.
Unfortunately attractiveness isn’t solely based on looks, or at least it shouldn’t be.
No matter QKOC, people come and go into your life, you just have to appreciate them for those few moments that they are there.
Oh well, nice picture though!
toddyenglish said,
December 12, 2008 at 6:59 pm
Boi, you are an eight and a half, easy! And your intelligence makes you a perfect ten. Love yourself, is all I have to say. There will always be haters.
hannah said,
December 12, 2008 at 7:07 pm
baby, your always a 10 in my book..
J. Clarence said,
December 12, 2008 at 8:55 pm
Just an eight and a half, Mr. English, how conservative of you. You know I was thinking about this, QKOC, not that I agree with his assessment, but you are looking at the glass literally half empty. To add a little positive spin on this rather somber subjective assessment, you could take it as being in the Top 5, being 50% better looking that all of the other people he has met, and you have a 1 in 2 chances of being found attractive (if this guy was the norm).
I dunno, I’m just trying to be optimistic.
queerkidofcolor said,
December 12, 2008 at 9:03 pm
I don’t care what number he put me under, it’s the way he said it that upset me. Me a 5? I can’t trip over that. There’s not a shortage of guys who like me and I’m assuming I hold some physical appeal to them. I was obviously bothered by his judgement, so much so that I wrote a blog posting about it. I was offended by the haste of his words and by the randomness of the topic. I won’t be reduced to someone validating me. For goodness sakes, I’m 20 years old.
manchild said,
December 13, 2008 at 1:39 am
I think yah a hundred….fuk that crazy fool
jd stokes said,
December 13, 2008 at 1:45 am
baby, yr at least a 12
!!
Corey @I'll Keep You Posted said,
December 13, 2008 at 4:12 am
Leave him alone! PERIOD! Anyone who takes you through THIS is not worth it! There’s an old saying that goes “GOOD RIDDANCE TO BAD RUBBISH”. Take heed to it! And don’t put yourself out there where people are commenting on your looks and placing you on their rating system. At 20, you almost already have the total package! Accept it! Move on! Move up! What’s your not-so-pretty “friend” going to do when he can no longer walk a ball? Love you, Steven!
Darian said,
December 13, 2008 at 3:00 pm
Steven- intelligence supersedes beauty for me any day, beauty fades. I can’t get over how “grown” you look in those pictures! LOL! Somebody’s filling out!
toddyenglish said,
December 13, 2008 at 6:03 pm
Oh, I also forgot to add that I love your style in the second pic…When I meet you we have to mix and match outfits, haha.
Acoustic Soul said,
December 14, 2008 at 5:26 pm
You are far from unattractive. Sometimes people have to put down others to lift themselves up. You did the right thing. Brush it off, and keep stepping.
lenaaa said,
December 15, 2008 at 11:13 am
shit u can get my number anytime steven
Darius T. Williams said,
December 15, 2008 at 2:01 pm
I’m with the majority on this issue…far from unattractive.
Quincy Jones said,
December 16, 2008 at 1:12 am
You are a cutie on duty. Fuck that hater ass friend!
QD said,
December 18, 2008 at 3:37 am
funny, i give u a 9 on your best day…no less than an 8 period
mayb my scale’s broken…or mayb beauty is just really in the eye of the beholder?
elg said,
December 18, 2008 at 2:11 pm
After seeing you in the above video, I am SURPRISED that you decribed yourself as “unattractive”. Forget about the creep who said you were a “5″.
I can’t assign you a number, but you are hot. Very hot. If I were younger …. And you have a BEAUTIFUL smile and PERFECT teeth.
queerkidofcolor said,
December 18, 2008 at 4:38 pm
Hey Elg,
Thanks for the comment…
Though I dont consider myself unattractive. I was going by what the guy I dated was saying…
nate said,
December 19, 2008 at 9:50 pm
Yeah, not sure where He got a five from. WTF!!!!!!! Far form anywhere near 5. And yeah He is an ass..le for even saything that.
Lamar said,
December 24, 2008 at 3:09 am
Manny ( Like I know you like that, lol),
I have recently been introduced to your blog and “The Lesman Show”. I must say I am impressed (If that means anything to you) by the novice and expert approach that you and Les so cleverly portray. Manny, from the first episode I was so taken back by the sheer wisdom, confidence that you possess and was compelled to find out who you were. Maybe you’ve heard this before, maybe not; When I look and listen to you I perceive that you have been here before or the old soul type. However, I immensely enjoy reading what you have to say as I procure the courage to share my life with the blogosphere. I can’t forget Les! Les you are the epitome of where many of us started out in the life, ignorant to the terms and the culture. It is remeniscient of my beginning. You capture the life of many who are coming into themselves and your candidness about your knowledge will help several others as they transform into a complete person. Ok I’m done for now.
Energy & Spirit,
Lamar Perez
bf3ars said,
February 5, 2009 at 12:22 am
your ex is a jerk…you are beautiful!
Kay said,
February 7, 2009 at 12:32 am
Just so you know I am a straight girl and I believe i have a crush on you. You are so cute and as you out it your energy is that of which i find simply intriguing. I know you don’t like girls so I’m not trying holla at you but i just wanted to make you see that a simply 5 in looks (which i think you are higher then that) can elevated to a 10 with your personality. Love your blog keep up the good work.