I am a writer/filmmaker/journalist/advocate/blogger, but by far the hardest role I am playing is being a virgin. I cannot tell you how hard it is to practice abstinence, but I feel it’s the right thing to hold on to until I find love. Where are you love?! My hormones are raging!
When I tell guys I’m a virgin, they go innnnn for it. That’s actually a turn on…I don’t see how. And yes, there have been guys. In and out {no pun intended}, but they are there. I try not to talk to friends and acquaintances about the guys I’m talking to because it makes me feel awkward. I have this built in perception of myself that I just feel like I need to maintain. And not letting people know who I‘m talking to or currently seeing fits that bill. And quite honestly people make a big deal out of me doing anything that makes me seem unreserved. I told my sister that I played spin the bottle for the first time and she couldn’t believe it. I’m not as socially tarnished and prudish as some may think, I do things here and there.
Although I’ve been talking to some guys ever so often, I still haven’t gone out on that real first date yet. I know, I know. Someday though. No eagerness here though, I’m no cliché. In the meantime I’m going to use this single time for personal growth and things like, I don’t know, planning a first date?
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THIS IS SHOCKING:
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CHICAGO (CBS) ― Activists fear gay African-Americans are being targeted for murder. Two openly gay men were killed recently on the South Side, as CBS 2’s Mike Parker reports.
African-American gay and lesbian groups are talking about the murders of two openly gay Black men in the past month.
On November 17, 24-year-old Larry Bland was shot to death in his Englewood home. Bland, a security guard at Northwestern Hospital was shot more than once after struggling with a man who had entered the house through an unlocked basement door.
Then on December 23, 47-year-old Donald Young, the choir director at Trinity United Church of Christ, was shot multiple times in his South Side apartment. His roommate found his body.
“We’re calling on the police department to let the community know what’s going on,” said Marc Loveless of the Coalition for Justice and Respect. “Are we under attack? Is this a serial killer?”
Chicago Police Department Acting Sept. Dana Starks said, “I understand the concerns of any group, any community when it comes to homicide. As of right now, I cannot say whether there is a connection.”
The media services director of the church where Donald Young taught and led the choir, said, “Young did live an openly gay lifestyle; that was his choice.”
But she went on to call the Loveless statement, “self-serving.” She also said the police are doing everything they can.
The brother of victim Larry Bland says if the murder was a hate crime, he would not be surprised.
“Englewood? Come on. That’s why a lot of gay guys won’t come out, because they fear for something like this to happen,” said Bland’s brother, Lynn.
Starks says that “at this time” there is no evidence the murders were hate crimes. But he told CBS 2, the investigations are still underway.
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Flavalife Magazine, the more delectable version of Flavamen magazine, will be going on hiatus for the next 6 months. The magazine will be going under some construction. Right now they are in the process of regrouping, and have plans on changing the appeal of the magazine.
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I often don’t write about relationships and dating and stuff of that nature. I probably won’t get the same response to this post the way others response to my other more “conservative” postings. But I’m curious to know, what are some qualities you look for in a potential partner?
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Okay, so I have some thoughts on the ballroom scene. I decided I’m going to break it up into a series of postings…I have a lot of thoughts on it!
The first ball I ever attended was the P.O.C.C ball in 2006. It was a few months short of my coming out and I had yet to experience the culture behind queerness. Upon arriving at the ball, the first people I encountered were some beautiful { I have to stretch out beautiful, they were hot} transgender females. I could tell they were transgender; they had large hands, big feet, and I could see their cheek bones were surgically uplifted. I remember taking out the camcorder {I was there to film for a video organization} and began to film one of the ladies, she ran up to me, and shoved the camcorder in my face. I wouldn’t have done anything then…but let someone try doing that now….
Anyways, since I was apart of the press, I was led upstairs to the VIP room. I was overwhelmed with the smell of perfume, tight laced outfits, men wearing make up, and masculine women. Every stereotype ever given to queer people existed within the four walls of that room. I was ignorant back then. Very ignorant. The look of a flamboyant- glittering- wearing-queen would have set me off on a thought rampage; throwing shade within the comforts of my head. Now, I know better and flamboyant-glitter- wearing-queens- just gets me extra excited **wink wink**. As I looked across the room, passed the tranny who had her tongue dipped in someone’s ear, across the butch queen who faced look like plastic, above the lesbian who had her jeans hanging from her butt, and aside from the couple dressed like something out of the Lord of the Rings, I began to realize something. Something I never thought existed within the queer community. My queerness was confined inside my bedroom, watching LOGO, working on Christopher Street the series {without really experiencing Christopher Street}, and trying to get a glimpse of gay people through photos on the web. But this ball made me realize this extra special something, I realized that these balls were our form of validation. Our form of happiness. Our form of saying “we too matter” . Our form excercising what made us unique.
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When I talk about the ballroom scene I don’t mix my feelings. How I feel about the ballroom scene is its on blog posting. I’ll keep those thoughts for a posting sometime in the future. I would say though, houses have lost their eloquence and appeal. I know what it is now was never what it was intended to be. I digress.
I stumbled upon the website Ballroom HQ. This is the first I have ever heard of it, but they have a great following. I’m going to be going on ever so often. I can’t keep myself out of the forums!
LINK: http://www.ballroomhq.com
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So, I’m looking over at the Morehouse College {a Historically Black all Male College} Summer Academy Catalog and I notice something:
Morehouse College does not discriminate in admissions policies and educational programs on the basis of race, color, age, religion, national origin, or persons with disablities.
Gee, Morehouse, what about the queers?
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